Tips for success! 

Getting the most

out of Speed Dating

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  • Make eye contact

  • Ask questions about the other person

  • Show respect at all times

  • Be kind in your assessments

  • Wear something that makes you feel confident

  • Report any harassment or inappropriate behaviour

  • Take it easy, have fun - there's no pressure

  • Only reveal as much information as you are comfortable revealing. If someone is pushing your boundaries politely ask them to stop. If they continue, speak to the host.



  • Be disrespectful or judgmental - everyone is different

  • Share personal information - for your safety and theirs

  • Push people's boundaries if they have asked you to stop

  • Any sexual harassment or inappropriate behaviour will not be tolerated and you will be removed from the event and banned from any future events

  • Don't talk about work, family or anything else that might be triggering or that people don't necessarily want to talk about with strangers or when they're trying to have fun chats. Try to keep it light instead and reframe those questions with things like "what do you do with your time", "what do you like doing".



Seven minutes is not very long and it can be very repetitive if the same questions are always asked. So try to be creative, have something different to talk about, try and avoid the same topics as everyone else and try finding something that the other person might be interested in.


People generally like talking about themselves, so if you're having trouble, the best thing you can do is ask questions - get to know the other person rather than dominating with your own stories. But  try to steer clear of yes/no questions, and frame your questions so that the other person can answer how they would like to answer - that way you can get to know them faster and you're not pressuring them into fitting your ideal person (ie "what do you do for work" can be problematic if the person is between jobs, hates their job or only works to pay bills. If you ask instead "what do you do with your time" the person can respond with the parts of their life that are meaningful and bring them happiness.)



Make eye contact, smile, think positive thoughts. Thinking positive has a massive impact on your outlook and the way others perceive you. So if you come in thinking happy thoughts, just like Peter Pan, you're much more likely to have engaging conversations and a successful evening. 


If you would like any further tips, there are some great resources online, and you can come along to one of the Workshops or try an intensive one on one support session.



Asking about jobs, children, previous partners and why they're at speed dating are questions better left for a second date because they can be confronting and if there's not a happy answer it will only make the other person uncomfortable. Remember that this is not a trial for marriage, it's a test to see if you can have a conversation with someone and would like to have a second conversation with them. They don't need to tick your boxes yet.




If you've got a couple of topics lined up ready to go you're not going to get stuck for things to talk about. Pretend that the person is waiting with you to catch a bus and you have seven minutes to chat about how the world works, what things are great in life and make a few jokes to keep the mood light. 

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  • What do you do with your time?

  • If you could do one thing to change the world what would it be?

  • If you were having a dinner party and you could invite any three people - living or historical figures - whom would they be and why?

  • What is the number one quality you would like your romantic partner to have and why?

  • Describe your ideal first date.

  • If you could have any job in the whole world, what would it be and why?

  • Rapid-fire two option questions about things that you like, to get a feel for whether the other person has similar interests: Sweet or savoury? Sci-fi or westerns? Heavy metal or pop music? Breakfast or Dinner? Night owl or early bird? Beach or mountains? and so on...

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